This week the designers were making something for high-powered, chic professional woman. Wait, she only plays one on TV. Cashmere Mafia, Lipstick Jungle, what's the difference? Both are pathetic shadows capitalizing on the success of HBO's Sex and the City, watered down for network television. Wow, so one got renewed huh? That's because NBC (home of Lipstick Jungle) has a superior product, of course. Hmmm...maybe I was naive before. I mean, ABC is such a successful network in comparison to NBC (#4 of 5), that maybe they just didn't need a show with low ratings dragging down their success, while NBC (like a shitfaced frat boy) takes anything it can get. That's right, suck it, GE! Don't try to ram your corporate synergy down my throat if you can't make a good tv show (30 Rock and Heroes excluded).
I think there are decent shows on all the big 5 networks, excepting the CW. I am amused and appreciative of Gossip Girl's newest campaign billboarding Los Angeles, but I haven't really been invested since Buffy left and stopped watching completely when Gilmore Girls wrapped. Since I can safely assume that everyone reading this has basic cable, or access to it, I think we can all agree that cable networks are where it's at when it comes to scripted shows. Even networks like AMC are getting into the game and kicking broadcast television's overly censored ass. Please watch the first season of Mad Men if you don't believe me.
I dream of a utopia where network tv has withered and died and the FCC along with it, but that's because I care about the quality of entertainment (which tends to have greater moral and social value if it's really good than if it's designed to stuff it's values down my throat; I'm talking to you Seventh Heaven and everything on ABC Family).
Wow, that was my TV rant. Okay, so, I sat watching Brooke Shields, who may be named a fashion icon as a former model who was one of the youngest on the cover of Vogue, but has NO relevence in the fashion world today and likely in the past 20 odd years, and I think again that Bravo may be trying to torpedo this lovely show before it goes to Lifetime.
The designers were charged with creating a day to night look for her character on Lipstick Jungle and were put into teams of two. To ratchet up the drama, of course the designers had to pitch to Shields and then pick the second member of their team playground style. Props to Jerell for being so enthusiastic in receiving the last pick (Stella).
There was no immunity prize this week because the gift of being exhibited on the fourth ranked broadcast tv network on a midseason replacement show's hail mary second season is so great! It's like having an outfit on bluefly.com, only better!
Props to Tim for sugar coating that pill and coaxing me to swallow it.
The pitch excerpts were horribly awkward. Here, Keith really stood out. "I've definitely worked with different body types and what not." Sir, your eloquence does you credit. He really stepped up his giant flaming asshole campaign when he said of his partner Kenley that he needed to "get her to shut her mouth...and stick to sewing". Suede was so overwrought, you'd think someone asked him to perform surgery with a penknife instead of sewing a top Terri-style. I don't blame Terri for being annoyed, but I do blame her for saying one of the creepiest things I've heard come out of anybody's mouth for a long time. I won't do you the disservice of quoting her verbatim, but I think we all noticed when she said nobody's sucking on her titties. This was supposed to cast Suede in an infantile light, but instead it just creeped me out, big time.
Blayne and Leanne
Not office appropriate. Bland. Bottom two? Questionable.
Kelli and Daniel
Skanky = Kor's "slutty, slutty, slutty"
I don't like Daniel. He seems so manufactured as to be a mannequin. I was disappointed to lose Kelli in favor of keeping him. Kenley laughing hysterically when Daniel says he has taste was priceless, but the way it was edited made it look really manufactured...I wondered if there was a response to the open question of why she was laughing, or if they had less to do with each other than it seemed. It might've been a bitch move...but since I don't like Daniel, I can't complain.
Jerell and Stella
I loved you both better seeing you be such a cute team. I don't like either of you individually as designers, but together you made something awesome. It may not have been right for the character on Lipstick Jungle, but it would be awesome on someone young and fashionable...
Korto and Joe
Awful. Looks cheap and resembles a bad science fiction costume that an alien race would be wearing. How this avoided the bottom two I'll never know, I guess because she had immunity and it would've been a fixed race?
Keith and Kenley
It looks nice - expensive and well put together, but I didn't really like it. By the principles of logic that makes it perfect for Lipstick Jungle.
Terri and Suede
Meh. I thought it looked like a Cavalli rip off and was unflattering. Tim liked it, so maybe it just didn't translate on screen? Maybe Tim just wanted an excuse for a group hug with Suede? Wait, that's right, he wasn't invited and decided to horn in.
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