Finale Part 2 - Bryant Park Fizzle

I didn't jump on blogging for this episode because it was such a disappointment. I saw it coming, but it didn't make it any less painful.
First we'll start with an episode rundown.
Carol Hannah is a train wreck. Vomiting, weeping, whatever happened to baby jane crazytown. Somehow she snaps out of it around the time they do hair and makeup consultations.
Tim expresses concerns about Irina and Althea having a similar messy smoky eye on the runway. Irina says "That's Althea." That bitch still thinks that Althea is copying her because hey both do knits and a smoky eye? Seriously? That's like saying she copied her because they both used red fabric (if only - more like all black). Everybody does a smoky eye. The grand irony here:
nymag.com/irina used another copyright for her shirts like a true ho
That's right, after being told she was using a copyrighted image for her first t shirt design, she writes out "reasons I love New York" lifted straight out of NY Mag 2008 Reasons to Love New York list.
Plus, she was outsmarted by a hotel deadbolt.

Tim was more upset than I've ever seen him before the show started. They must have really been running behind. Unprofesh.

The other worst part of the show...The designers introducing their collections.
Althea was the worst I've ever seen. Wearing Ugg Boots, it was like a spontaneous drunk wedding toast more than a practiced/professional introduction. Irina's was also bad.
ew's coverage of Project Runway finale when it happened in Feb
I found out after the fact that the designers did not introduce their collections to the crowd or appear on the runway. That was all tv editing. They actually introduced their collections to an empty house before their shows started. I don't know whether that makes the results better or worse. They were probably distracted, and definitely not trying to impress anyone...but they can't blame it on nervousness from public speaking. I'm upset that the show decided not to address this situation at all. They certainly had the time during a protracted legal battle...

The guest judge:
Suzy Menkes
It's mean but I have to say it, she's a hot Mrs. Doubtfire-esque mess. That hairstyle!

So here's the runway:

Althea















Carol Hannah















Irina















What do I really like? Althea's green dress, CH's long black/maybe purple? satiny gown and her teal 13th look dress. That's it.
I felt instantly when the runway was finished that Irina would win, no contest. Did I particularly love or want any of her pieces? No.
However, she was the only one who had a connective thread and brought drama to the runway. I think she was incredibly stupid to do another black piece for her 13th look. I am not interested in her future career in the slightest.
I prefer Carol Hannah two the other two designers. I love some of her stuff, but did not enjoy the tulle barrel skirt or the teal barber's cape. I think she was trying too hard to be "edgy."

I was annoyed that they did let's meet the judges twice.

This may be a familiar rant, but I feel compelled to make it. I think that as the show has gone on, the execution quality of garments has skyrocketed in inverse proportion to creativity. I believe that the competition to be a part of the show increasing has done a great disservice to PR. When the contestants consisted of talented amateurs, we got people with ideas that were out there, who hadn't necessarily already worked in the industry or had classical training and fashion schooling and didn't know the "rules." That meant they weren't constrained by the can and can'ts of the fashion industry, but only by their own imaginations. I think taking PR pro was a huge mistake, and I can only hope they end up with a professional wunderkind who hasn't had success - which seems farfetched.

They mean it when they say that this was the most talented crop of designers yet, but what do they have to show for it? Nothing but lackluster already seen before garments. No bold statements. Certainly nothing I would rush out to buy.
Leanne was more creative than all three of these women put together.

Finale Part 1

To kick off this pseudo-episode, Heidi met with the designers on the runway to tell them about their final challenge: creating a 12 piece collection for Bryant Park with $9000 and several months.
This was followed up by a hilariously awkward dance between Heidi and Tim in silhouette behind the runway. Heidi dances like a freak and Tim was obviously generally uncomfortable dancing - so it made a delicious combination.

Tim journeyed out five weeks before Fashion Week to check on the progress of the three designers.
First stop = Huntington, NY to see Carol Hannah. She has been working out of a friend's house.
I was unsurprised to learn that CH was an awkward child, but was surprised to see her classic and beautiful mother. She should give her daughter some grooming tips!
Seeing Tim Gunn say "I love a kitchen" and making biscuits in a apron was worth the price of admission.

Next up was a trip to Upper East Side Manhattan to see Irina. I was actually surprised at the size of her apartment considering her entitled princess attitude...but maybe that's her prop sympathy workroom apartment rented just for PR?
She does have a lapdog named Princess. *barfs in mouth*
Tim tells her to make sure her collection doesn't looked forced. Impossible!
Everything about her is contrived and forced. The only thing I actually believed coming out of her mouth this episode was about her mother. I think she actually loves someone besides herself, which I would have thought impossible prior to this episode. I was forced to throw up in my mouth again when Tim went after-school special on us and said "Regardless of the outcome, Irina is already a winner."
Then her mom riffed on them being winners for having a daughter like her and I went into a diabetic coma. Lifetime, what have you done to Project Runway?!

Next Tim heads to Dayton, Ohio to drop in on Carol Hannah. From the dangerous looking warehouse elevator to the street scenes of life in Ohio, I have now been convinced that I never want to go there.
What a love letter to OH from the producers of PR. I think it reads:

Ohio. It blows.

Althea was mind-meltingly stupid during this visit. She vaguely stated that she was inspired by sci-fi movies without any elaboration. She told Tim she wanted to be a designer because she always loved art and drawing...the end. She seems to have no depth at all. Maybe she's just camera shy and terse, but I get the impression she's an Amazon-sized rube.

The producers decide not to inform Irina that her stupid trademarked design Coney Island t's are out until 10 days before fashion week to up the drama. She frets and decides to replace them with an equally as stupid/stupider t of her own design.

I loved the amazingly incredible awkwardness in the hotel suite after Irina and Althea exchanged a faux-warm greeting. The tension was palpable.

Then Tim arrives to tell the girls about CH's terrible contagious stomach virus. The girls react with barely contained glee. Irina says she feels truly bad - complete shit. At least Althea acknowledges that they can't really be upset about the competition taking knocks.

Against all odds, Carol Hannah shows up in the workroom the next day, telling the other girls she was up barfing all night. My husband says she looks better when she's sick. I think she had her hair done for fashion week - huge improvement.

Nina and Michael come in to give advice. Seemingly without seeing any of the girl's work - Nina makes an "innocent" comment about how an all black collection is difficult to pull off and Irina gets her back up about Nina being wrong. B---h, whether she's wrong or right, you do realize that she's judging you right?

As usual, the designers have a last minute challenge sprung on them. They are to create a thirteenth look to fit in with their collection. Logan, Christopher, and Gordana show up to lend a hand.

In a horrible stunt to try to convince people to watch the abomination known as Models of the Runway, the producers decide to let the "Muse models" cast the models for the thirteenth look. You know they are going to pick models fatter, uglier, and/or older than themselves so that they can look better. *sigh*

Althea gets first pick and snatches up Logan. Irina gets Gordana, and CH is stuck with Chris. He may be doomed to be rejected by PR and also be given a small-pox blanket (in the form of a hug and partnership with stomach virus of doom CH).

Why Althea didn't pick Gordana - who is obviously the best seamstress, is beyond me.

They are given the requisite sketch time and $250 for the NY Mood.

As promised, the episode ends in CH toilet jockeying. If only there had been more actual vomit and less schlocky vomit-inducing moments...
Althea tries to help by putting an ice pack on the back of her neck. Who does that? Is that a thing?

I am concerned. Although much was saved for the finale, what I did see of the designers collections was very underwhelming. I'm not holding out much hope of loving these collections.

Art School Confidential

This runway episode is the last challenge. Heidi makes a crack about views and I yell Getty at the t.v. and hedge my bets with "or Hollywood sign".
The designers think it's a sign of how very serious Project Runway is - with LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa showing up to welcome them to the Getty challenge.
Whereas I, being a (somewhat cynical) realist, realize that it's nothing more than our second-rate mayor being a media whore.
Tim G. takes the five remaining designers on a 30 minute tour of the Getty. It's
all rainbows and sunshine as the designers find their inspirations.
The designers are given 30 minutes to sketch and are transported to Mood for their last visit.

Chris is still doing his Cinderella routine - I can't believe someone like ME is HERE.
Everyone has paired up and Althea is the odd Amazon out.

Tim was cracking me up this episode. Calling Irina's goat cape "roadkill" and her look "a post-apocalyptic moment" and then that delightful cackle.
Plus, there was that hilarious crack about Nina's stilettos shooting off her feet.

Gordana is super emotional about Monet and her dress, appealing to the audience on a spiritual level. I like Monet as much as the next guy, but Monet is so bland as an inspiraiton - pure gift shop material. His paintings fall perfectly in line with meek Gordana's grey aesthetic.

"I'm here for the final challenge, how many can say that?"
Um, 5?

Chris describes himself as a designer - "pretty but kinda dirty."
Me - "good ideas, but messy results"

Althea was so busy shooting laser beams out of her eyes at Irina she stabbed her model with a pin - poor thing, she barely missed a vital organ.

The judges this week:
Cynthia Rowley
Nina Garcia
Cindy Crawford (gorgeous)


Althea

Inspiration = Getty Center Architecture:

Very messy. I can see the architecture connection, but the design is made to look all the worse since the Getty building has such clean lines.


Carol Hannah

Inspiration = French Bed:

Call me crazy, but I saw it more as
Inspiration = Disney:

It's a gorgeous and flattering red carpet ready dress. It's also very safe and kinda bland considering the inspiration.


Christopher

Inspiration = Algae-covered Rock Fountain:

I like the idea - but the judges nailed it: poor textile choices, lacking execution.
I think that Gordana and Chris should form a design team where he sketches and she makes the garments. They could learn from each other.


Gordana

Inspiration = Claude Monet's The Portrait of Rouen Cathedral in Morning Light:

The dress is fine. Not transcendant, not ugly. The back is worse than the front, as Nina observed.


Irina

Inspiration = John William Godward's Mischief and Repose:

I can see the inspiration here; she's trying to make a stick figure look rubenesque. The color and the back are nice. The dress as a whole is a big fail. It looks more like a bad gypsy costume than a lounging Grecian goddess.

The designers are asked to defend themselves and choose the three who should go on to Bryant Park.
Irina chooses Althea and Gordana
Gordana chooses Chris and Irina
Chris chooses Carol Hannah and Irina
Althea chooses Carol Hannah and Irina
Carol Hannah chooses Chris and Althea
Breakdown:
Everyone thinks Irina should go except Carol Hannah. Three think Chris should go to BP(not Althea or Irina - the two hardest chicks in the competition), three think Carol Hannah should go to BP(not Irina or Gordana), three think Althea should go to BP(not Gordana or Chris - the emotional ones who think they should go in her place - sensing weakness), and two think Gordana should go (I'm counting the designers - who want themselves to go through - as a vote; aka no one thinks she should go except herself and her best buddy Irina who obviously wants to pick off the steeper competition).

I must be getting too jaded, because Christopher's emotional I am the algae covered rocks speech did not get me. I think it got my husband a little though. heh.
Anyways, I think Chris is the biggest girl left in the competition and his crying and belly-aching was starting to give me Ricky deja vu (that's a BAD thing).

I love how Irina's Oscar speech about how she is a poor immigrant who is struggling was so hollow and rehearsed. She is obviously rich and overpriviledged, why not just say she deserves it on merit alone instead of insulting everyone's intelligence with her poor acting. She was not emotional at all on learning she had made it. She obviously expected it. Bitch.
At least Carol Hannah was gratified.

Thoughts:
I think Gordana and Christopher were the deserving parties to be sent home and that both should not have made it this far. I can't say I'm very excited about seeing the final collections with the pool left though. I would choose Carol Hannah as my favorite among the ladies, but I have no strong sentiments - other than a hope to see a lot of vomit in the next episode.

My pick for the winner, final collections sight unseen:
Carol Hannah
PS-Please stop doing smoky eye and bedhead, you look like you just rolled out of the gutter.

Logan's Run

We're down to 6 designers this week: 4 girls and 2 boys left. It's almost over, and I must say I'm relieved at the prospect of getting a new crop of designers. This group has been disappointing to me.
This week's challenge: Create a companion piece for your best look. They seemed to indicate that the designers did not get to choose their best look, with the turn around reveal. All of them had challenge-winning looks on the stage except Logan, whose look was selected from the first challenge where Christopher won.
I don't dislike the remaining designers' best looks - but does anyone notice how colorless and monochromatic they are? I want some vibrant color. I'll die if the Bryant Park shows are all brown and black.
They are given time to sketch - I swear I heard a lot of talk about pants, but only one pair showed up in the end, and then $100 in Mood money.
Irina claims to be good at spending money - no surprise there.

They all head back to the work room and Gordana does a tension monologue. Suddenly, the tension orchestra cues and all the close-ups show agonized faces. It's easy to create tension through editing, isn't it crappy production company?

Then the producers kick into a humble beginnings theme for the bottom two designers. Logan does the born in humble Idaho routine and Gordana blows him out of the water with her Bosnian/Serbian border number. No wonder he lost.

While Logan works on his outfit, Althea and Irina are kicking it high school mean girls style, eating In & Out and talking gossipy smack on him.
Since when is anyone friends with Irina?
Obviously, big mistake since Irina turns on Althea a few hours later in front of the judges.

Althea is the first to identify the Logan effect and says of Logan "He thinks because he's cute he can do whatever he wants." Maybe she broke the spell?
I'm sure it didn't help him that the judges/producers had to reflect on the designer's past work product for this challenge - he doesn't really have anything worth a second look.

Irina turns on Althea calling her "insane and drunk" for copying her knitwear in her Aspen look.

The judges this week:
Nick Verreos (from Season 2 of Project Runway aka the good ol days)
Nina Garcia
Kerry Washington


Althea

BEST LOOK (episode 4):

That either of these won boggles my mind. Really. I think the paper bag waist is a sloppy style. I think the new look is crazy bag lady sloppy with that shapeless sweater. I don't understand why the tops she makes are always so unsupportive and nipple-y. I think it's a hot mess and I would never have chosen it as the winner.


Carol Hannah

BEST LOOK (episode 9):

Maybe a bit plain - but super cute and pretty.


Chris

BEST LOOK (episode 1):

I was completely torn on this. It really is two different dresses. The black and the applique are gorgeous and the heavy white petticoats are not. It would've been transformed by an airy chiffon under the applique - in some color other than white!


Gordana

BEST LOOK (episode 8):

Drab. Bland. Gordana. I was surprised that this won over Logan's design, but I'm sure she is destined for the chopping block.


Irina

BEST LOOK (episode 10):

It's nice. I get the feeling every time I see one of her designs that it would make the average woman look like a fat Russian prostitute (aka Mariah Carey) but is only saved by the coat hanger model frame. Plus, she's a bitch.


Logan

BEST LOOK (also episode 1):

I kinda liked it. It reminded me of costumes from the movie Hackers.

It wasn't really a couture design...and I think that Logan doesn't deserve to hit Bryant Park, so I'm not gonna cry about it.

Final 3:
1. Irina
2. Carol Hannah
2. Althea

Around the World in 80 Days

The episode pretty much kicks off with a Nicolas monologue about how the competition is kicking into high gear and he's got his eyes on the prize. "Right now it's just me me me." As opposed to the rest of the time when he's off doing humanitarian projects for the Peace Corps.
Heidi doesn't make a stupid pun or come on this episode about the challenge...though she does mislead. She tells the designers they're headed to Rodeo Dr to meet a world renowned designer. All true except they've already met him; much more accurate to say meet WITH.
When she announces this, everyone has stars in their eyes and will only be disappointed when they get old hat Kors, even if he is a fabulous hat.
Kors, or the editor of this episode, might have been drunk because he made an "encouraging" statement that really didn't make logical sense.
"Whether real or imaginery I wanna see what kind of fabulous outfits you're gonna come up with." Was he inviting an emperor's new clothes scenario? How can you have an imaginary outfit? All of the places of inspiration were real, so it can't be an imaginary place...*scratches head*.

The challenge:
Choose a location that embodies who you are as a designer and the locale.

The designers are given 30 minutes to sketch and a $150 budget at Mood.
Then the usual boring workroom stress and Irina bitching about everyone being less talented than her.

The judges:
Michael Kors
Nina Garcia
Milla Jovovich
The family is all back together! I was beginning to think that MK and Nina Garcia were Superman/Clark Kent.
I loved that everyone genuinely responded to Kors' greeting and Nina's faux enthusiasm was met with a few half-hearted grunts.
My husband commented that Milla J was the first nice judge they've had. He doesn't watch them all, but she did have a special something. She seemed very enthusiastic and kind.

Althea
St. Tropez


Plain but nice. They didn't even bother photographing the back...

Carol Hannah
Palm Beach


Pretty, but looks like an Uli dress more than a Carol Hannah design.

Christopher
Santa Fe


The colors are good. The belt is great. I looked at it and I was warm towards it, yet felt dubious. I realize that it's the proportions that bugged me. It looks like a hourglass - and not the flattering, sexy hourglass. More like two triangles that are horizontal reflections of each other. It's quite unflattering.

Gordana
New York


Great top, but I'm not loving the dress. the puckering of the fabric and the bulge on the model's ass make it look a little messy. I think for me it's just a personal style issue. I wouldn't wear something like that and I don't really admire it.

Irina
Aspen


I kinda like it, but it reads really bitchy and the monochromatic color scheme is so boring. How awesome would it look if that sweater were a royal blue or some jewel tone. Her color choices are always so yawn-inducing. You can be chic AND colorful.
PS- Leggings still aren't pants!

Logan
Hollywood


A bad outfit for an extra in a movie set a few years in the future. Like Gamer!
The LOGAN EFFECT is in full effect, though Milla Jovovich seems immune. Is it because she was engineered by Umbrella Corp? Maybe it's just that actors learn to discount physical beauty since they see a lot more of it than us mere mortals.

Nicolas
Greece (I love how all of the rest of the locations are cities and this is a friggin country. Guess they thought the typical American wouldn't know a city in Greece.)


I actually agree with Milla. I like the top. The sleeves I could take of leave, but the torso reminds me of Herve Leger. The pants are a fugly fail.

I've decided that Christopher should be an accessories designer. This is his second fabulous belt.
Heidi tells Gordana she needs confidence and Gordana bows her head and mumbles okay. What an on-the-nose response!
Heidi begins with "The Rest of You"
and I imagined her going: You're all out.
and felt good. It would have been just. Everyone is just so boring.

Still, I felt that Christopher was acknowledging that he is lucky to have survived as long as he had and had made his peace with his impending Auf. I was shocked to see Nicolas go over him, though I feel both departures were inevitable. Both certainly deserved their bottom status this week.

Bryant Park 3:
1. Althea
2. Irina
3. Logan

The Witches

This week's challenge:
Create an extravagant stage look in the manner of Bob Mackie.

I enjoyed seeing Mackie. He seemed genuinely enthusiastic, unlike most PR guests, and very happy.
The way the footage was edited from beaming Nicolas to Mackie, it seemed like the Feather Prince and the Sultan of Sequins were having a moment there.
After the Mackie reveal, the designers discover that they will be making a stage look for Christina Aguilera.
They are given 30 minutes to sketch, 2 days to construct their garment, and a $300 budget at Mood.
The workroom looks like Vegas threw up on it when the designers get back from Mood.
Tim comes in and slams Shirin: "looks like student work."
Irina follows up: "I don't see her as a designer"
But Nicolas gets the last word, calling Irina a bitch. If the bitchy feather prince is calling you a bitch...
I think Gordana had a nervous breakdown. She was really in off-her-meds lunatic territory. It's weird because she had immunity.

The judges:
Bob Mackie
Nina Garcia (notice that when she comes back, the designers are not happy or excited as when Kors returned)
Christina Aguilera


Althea


I'm not really feeling it. I think the fabric looked kinda sloppy and I don't like the shrug.


Carol Hannah

I like it. It seemed more like a red carpet look than something for the stage...


Christopher


I don't have pictures of the tear off top piece, but it pretty much went like this:
meh, tear off to reveal meh
They were right saying the reveal looked like a cheap halloween version of Lady Marmalade. But awkwardly, it looks more like Mya's outfit than Christina's.


Gordana

Horrid. It needs to be burned.


Irina

This looks like CH's feared ice skating costume. The producers are shaping up to turn Irina into Cruella Deville.


Logan

It's a little lost and sloppy, but I think it's cute. It is very PG Barbarella.


Nicolas

I think this looks beautifully crafted. This is Nicolas's niche. He shouldn't be having runway shows, he should be a costume designer for the stage.


Shirin

Fail. Second only to Gordana. That being said, I had my money on Christopher being off. He has been in the bottom of the barrel for awhile and I was shocked to see him squeak by yet again.

Bryant Park 3:
1.Carol Hannah
2.Logan
3.Althea

Cougar Town

This episode missed the mark. Not only did it have a creepy tone that seemed to glorify divorce more than empower divorcees, but once again there was a lack of clear winning designs and a lot of crap.
The challenge was to convert an old wedding dress into a fashionable look for divorced women.
Instantly after model selection, Shirin starts her tiny woman whinefest. "I got nothing to work with", life is unfair...blah blah blah. Does she know how many picks Epperson got selected last? He needs to tell Shirin to man up.
Ironically, in the midst of her complaining, tears, and generally tired dramatics she said "I'm such a strong person." If you SAY so...
Tim came through and announced that the winner of this challenge will be granted immunity for next week and that this is the last opportunity for immunity in the competition. He elicits a round of groans when he lets everyone know this is a one day challenge.
The divorcees come in and consult. Nothing out of the ordinary except Shirin's make me a feathered Cher costume woman and Nicolas' crazy hippie (maybe they should've switched? Shirin's lady needed a feather prince).
The designers did get a trip to Mood with a budget of $25 for up to 2 yards of fabric and anything else they needed.

The judges this week:
Michael Kors (still back)
Zanna Roberts
Tamara Mellon (she was basically not present as far as I can recall)

Althea


I don't think the idea is bad, it almost seems cute on first glance, but it's like the leaning tower of Pisa. It has all these sloppy bits that turn it fug. The cups are odd, the back just looks messy. It misses the mark.

Carol Hannah


I actually thought this dress was great. I did write wtf shrug. It was just wrong. Bad color, didn't work for the dress at all.

Christopher


I wrote cute belt in my notes. That's really all I can say for it. I'm about to be cruel now, but only because Chris' client said she was an actress. I'm sure she could get work - but only as a transvestite. She looks like a man (Iggy Pop, in fact). She had her hair and makeup professionally done and it did nothing! This has no bearing on the ugly dress though.

Epperson


I totally see what the judges were saying, but I thought the dress wasn't ugly. I can't say the same for many other designs this week.

Gordana


I love this dress. Deserved win. That said, the hair/makeup/accessories stink. She does not know how to put a look together.

Irina


She does know how to put a look together. Must be all that dog accessorizing. However, I don't care for this dress. The look as a whole is strong, the dress seems well made, it just doesn't really look flatting to me. I think the sleeves and chest are throwing me off. It's an almost.

Logan


Hideous. In the words of one judge, a "tragedy." This is yet another piece in support of my "Logan will win for pretty" theory from last week.

Nicolas


This is also craptastic. Not as bad as Logan's but really, Nicolas even said it was hideous.

Shirin


Cute, but really? It was so average and something you could buy at any mall...

Bryant Park Three
1. Carol Hannah
2. Logan
3. Shirin