I'm sure most of you hardcore fans have heard that Project Runway is slated to move to Lifetime after it's fifth and final season on Bravo and that the show's production company - Magical Elves is also being left behind.
So my question is, does Bravo really want people to watch what happens? I didn't see much in the way of project runway promos for this season. It seems to me that a smart network would want to hobble their prize racehorse before it ran against them...I suppose that remains to be seen.
Harkening back to the first design challenge of Project Runway Season 1, the designers had to find materials to make a design in Gristedes grocery store.
Darling Austin Scarlett appeared looking like Willy Wonka.
Well, first things first. Does everyone else hate Blayne as much as I do? Not in the Santino Rice sort of mustache-twirling villian way, but in the "when can we stop looking at it" sort of way? His manufactured catch phrases, so much less endearing than Christian, and his manufactured tan make him the most annoying contestant I've yet seen on the show. PS, who believes this fake ass bitch's name is really Blayne Walsh? He made up a name that was an amalgamation of Pretty in Pink and 90210 and manages to capture the tackiness of both. If that's not annoying enough, let's spell Blayne with a "Y"! Why is this kid on this show and not in Diablo Cody's entourage?
Call me ageist if you want, but Stella and Terri are both hideous. Both look like they did too many drugs, both are too skinny. Two hot trannie messes!
It doesn't help that I hate both of their aesthetics as well. Terri's lookbook pages included some of the most heinous crap I've ever seen.
There are about four girls with precious girly style and red lipstick that all seem like the same person to me. Where's the girl who wears jeans?
It seems like experience makes designers too practical. I was disappointed in the lack of boldness/innovation in their materials selection.
Emily Brandle
This chick reminds me of Taryn Manning if she didn't look like a drugged-out prostitute. Maybe TM is Emily's evil twin.
Tablecloth, Balloons, Napkins, Bouncy Ball
This out was pretty meh. The only interesting part was the neck ruff and was so reminiscent of Chris' speciality last season but with a poorer execution.
Jerell Scott
Tablecloth, Lawn Chairs, Cocktail Umbrellas, Koosh Ball
Looks like the waitress uniform for a Mexican restaurant.
Leanne Marshall
Tablecloth, Meringue Cookies, Coffee Filters, Marshmallows
Cute. Safe materials. Boring results.
Korto Momlu
Has the most amazing name ever. Sounds like a movie title.
She is either very reserved or a bitch. Only time will tell. I do love her makeup.
Tablecloth, Kale, Bell Peppers, Cherry Tomatoes
Beautiful colors. I loved the vegetables. There was too much dress for me. Short hem or shorter sleeves wouldn't been less overwhelming.
Jennifer Diederich
Paper Towels and Lipstick
Tragically safe and forgettable, just like Jennifer. The only positive thing I can say is, at least there's no tablecloth.
Daniel Feld
Plastic cups and muslin
Loved it. Beautiful color, classic design. Dress for a siren.
He has the reserved energy of Daniel V.
Terri Stevens
Mop Heads and Tablecloth
Crap.
Suede
Quotes: "Suede needed to make millions for Suede"; "Whackadoodle"
This guys annoys me. He's not that likable and the one named factor ain't helping.
Tablecloth and Doggie Waste Bags
So ugly! Bad length, bad neckline, hideous fabric. How'd this snake by the bottom 3?
Stella Zotis
The quote master general!
"I'm gonna make what I do"<--What the hell does that even mean?
She looks like Cher might've looked after hard drugs and no plastic surgery. Then she complains about the quality of her garbage bags "The aesthetic might turn out to be garbage" the worst part is, she didn't seem to be conscious of any irony. "If I'm the first eliminated designer I'm gonna be the jackass of the nation" No ma'am, I think that title is safe with President Bush, and I was surprised that this self fulfilling prophecy didn't come to pass. I guess they expect you to do something interesting?
Garbage Bags
Sigh.
Joe Faris
A straight man with kids...interesting.
Oven mitts, Pasta, Muslin, Tomato Can Labels
Hideous top, great skirt.
Kenley Collins
Dodge Ball, Lawn Chair, Tablecloth
For me this dress just works. The model was particularly great.
Jerry Tam
We get it. You're hot shit. You think you're slumming. Of course your design sucks.
Shower Curtain, Tablecloth, Gauze, Napkins, Rubber Gloves
Nuts!
The American Psycho comment was right on. This was no April Showers, May Flowers...
Wesley Nault
Tablecloth, Fly Swatter, Plastic Cups
Okay. Doesn't flatter the model. Doesn't have much visual interest. We saw much worse.
Blayne Walsh
Ugh. Please stop saying Girlicious. In fact, please stop talking. I beg you.
Drawer Liners, Shoelaces, Jump Rope, Potholders
I can appreciate it for being different. A train wreck is powerfully interesting to look at too. It couldn't be further from my taste. Too bad this picture doesn't have Girlicious written on the model's thigh (as it was on the runway).
Kelli Martin
"It's gonna be a pretty ugly dress, for sure. Pretty ugly in a great way"
Is that like Steve Buscemi? I'm not sure that something can actually be ugly in a great way, at least not in my experience.
Vacuum Bags, Bleach, Dye, Coffee Filters, Thumbtacks, and Notebooks
Pretty. Interesting. Great show of ingenuity. I can't fault them for giving it to her.
Keith Bryce
Tablecloth, Laundry Bags, Car Shade
Safe. Pretty, but boring, just like him.
1 comment:
Very witty writing - I look forward to your comments after every show. I laughed when I read your comments about Stella. When they introduced her I thought wow, she reminds me of Cher. You should write professionally and Blayne should be killed.
Post a Comment